Is it possible to be angry at the universe? Is it possible to one day not go into work & within say, twenty minutes become so angry that you question why you bother doing anything the whole day?
In my case, yesterday at work, as I was working my stock, I became hot & sweaty & so pissed off, because the damn aweful bristle mats were so heavy, trying to heave them up an industrial ladder by myself,so that I could put them on a high shelf.I realize I probably could've asked for help from one of the other people working, but it would've taken them away from what they were doing, & frankly, I have some stupid, stubborn pride that I could do it myself. They're hateful things these mats, & yet, I think they must serve some purpose, since we sell so many of them. Still, they're a pain in the ass to deal with, because if you're not careful you're liable to get splinters in your fingers.
I was fairly busy throughout the day, so I never went back to the rugs section until an hour before we closed. I just about died. I was absolutely livid when I saw what I saw. There, sitting in a heap on top of a display of straw mats, where a pile of very heavy Bali rungs. I looked around & there wasn't a single shelf that wasn't left untouched. The whole section looked wrecked. This is when I thought to myself, "this is completely unfair", this is when I got angry with the universe, thinking to myself, in what world does it give a person a right to come into a store & leave an utter wreck in their wake????
And so it went, I set about making it all nice & neat again, but oh was I mad. I was so frustrated & at the end of my rope, that for the first time in a couple of weeks, I actually shed a few hot, angry, frustrated tears again for a minute, before I made myself stop. All I could do is curse under my breath & get on with it. I know that after all these years of working in retail, I should be used to it, but I will never, ever get used to this. To me, it's just bloody common sense! It's common courtesy. None of which, I realize, exist anymore. It's really sad to say but really, things like common courtesy, common sense, manners,respect & consideration for your fellow man or woman, just does not exist anymore & I find that so sad & appalling.
There are times when I really hate working in retail, & wonder if there were anything else I could do for a living. I wish I knew, because I'm not getting any younger. One of my managers told me something the other day that was so true. He said that at one time, working in a grocery store or a retail store was respectable, but not anymore. Nowadays, your more likely to get spit on, bitched at, threatened, assaulted with product, cursed at than anything else. And I know it works both ways. At the beginning of my day, I never start out to be anything but courteous & helpful to my customers, I will do anything I can to make them happy. But by mid day, when I'm re-packaging the 12th opened curtain panel left callously in a heap, I'm really not feeling all that helpful anymore. I feel very short tempered by the end of the day, particularly if I've been working for 4-5 days in a row.
Looking ahead, I only have five months to go before I leave on my big Australia trip that I've worked so hard for. I really can't wait to go. Before that trip though, I have another one to look forward to this month, when I go out to Kelowna BC for six days to see my friend. That I'm very anxious for. I know my friend is anxious to see me too. Lots of good things on the horizon.