I started out to begin a new blog post this morning, sure of what I was going to write about, but all of the sudden, I'm finding myself clamming up, unsure of what to say or how to say it. I sometimes find blogging to be a double edged sword, wanting to reveal a bit of personal stuff about me, & yet not wanting to go too far, because this is the WWW after all. Then there's the other, more superficial stuff I like to blah-blah-blah about, pop culture, music, stupid celebrities. I could go on about how ridiculous all that stuff is for days. It wouldn't be too interesting though, besides which, I have no idea if anyone even reads what I write anyway.
So, I've got six days to go until I'm off to BC for six days. I'm very excited & anxious to see my friend. I have no idea how it's going to go, but I'm planning to be hopeful. Hopeful that my friend & I will come to the mutual decision that yes, I will move out there when I get back from Australia. I want to so much, work, such as it is, is motivating me more & more every day, because I just don't want to be there anymore, it's not the fun place it once was, it's just gotten too weird. So many of my favorite people aren't there anymore, & the ones who are there are just too green to know any better yet.
I'm so looking forward to this six day trip out to BC, I really can't wait to see it, as I've never been to BC before. I keep hearing really great things about the place, I'm really hoping that I'll like it enough to want to live there, at least for a little while anyway. Life is really exciting & scary sometimes. I realize that I probably should've done this a long, long time ago, but I think for a long time fear has kept me here, which is so not a good thing at all. As I've gotten older, I've ocme to realize that you have to shit or get off the pot, & so it's with a lot of trepidation, but confidence (somewhat) that I'm heading off for my first major trip alone to Australia. Somehow, I'm hoping, if I can survive that, maybe I'll be able to survive living across the country from my parents. I'm well aware that there will more than likely be bumps in the road, I just hope I'll be able to deal with whatever roadblocks come along.
In the meantime, I keep this line running in my head, when I feel I'm about to panic: Keep Calm and Carry On